One Year — A Reminder to Believe in the Impossible

You must carry a mustard seed of faith.

About one year ago, I started my Medium page, and my first article was “The Truth is I’m a Black Woman.”

In the unholy morning hours, my mind anxiously raced. I was frustrated, tired, hurt, and confused. I had countless words to say but not a single soul to tell them to, and so, I picked up my laptop and started typing.

I had no expectations of anyone reading my writing. I thought no one could find me on such a huge platform. I thought it was impossible. At first, I wasn’t going to publish my piece. I felt maybe it was something to keep to myself. Yet, my spirit kept telling me to click publish.

And I thus began my journey.

I started writing as a means to remember, almost like each article was a letter to my future self. Letters to believe in myself, letters of courage and truth, letters of heartbreak and growth, and letters of knowledge and curiosity. I wanted to remember my experiences, especially in the troubling year 2020. This is probably why many of my articles are quite vulnerable.

And with each new article, I’m learning to embrace my voice and confront the demons of my past, present, and future. I can proudly stand in my authentic, vulnerable, and unfiltered self, which is something I’ve struggled to do for many years.

I learned to use my voice on different platforms despite the fear and anxiety of being inadequate. Before writing, I thought it was impossible to be heard in a sea full of voices because every day, a new article is published, a new podcast is started, a new YouTube channel begins. I felt like it was impossible to be heard and impossible for my voice to matter.

However, despite what I thought was impossible, I did my first podcast with Matthew Weeks, Work in Programming. I spoke at two conferences, the Elasticsearch Community Conference and the PowerToFly Diversity Reboot. And finally, I shared my experiences with future software developers at the University of Toronto, Department of Computer Science Industry Night.

And since these events, I’ve received countless messages across social media platforms. People have felt inspired, uplifted, and informed from my writing, and I’m genuinely humbled.

Nothing was impossible.

But I had to be courageous to realize that fact.

Whatever you choose to pursue in your life, you must be courageous, and you must believe in the impossible.

Please, listen to the gentle voice that is pushing you to do the impossible. I believe that if you have faith in something bigger than man, more significant than the laws of math and physics, and louder than what the nay-sayers say, then you can change your life. And please don’t regard that sentiment in a strictly religious way. But, we must carry some optimism if we wish to change ourselves and the world.

“I don’t think we have any alternative other than remaining optimistic. Optimism is an absolute necessity, even if it’s only optimism of the will, as Gramsci said, and pessimism of the intellect.” — Angela Davis

The world cannot change if we don’t believe in that change, and similarly, you cannot change if you don’t believe in the change you wish to make for yourself. And with that belief, you must be diligent and resilient because change only happens if you put in the effort to see through your goals to the end.

You must carry a mustard seed of faith.

We’re living in a difficult moment. It’s not always easy to remember to be hopeful, grateful, and humble. But, I’ve learned that these are the components to living a fulfilling life. You must be hopeful in the change you seek, grateful for every experience, regardless if it's positive or negative, and humble in the truth you stand within. With these three things, not only can you make the impossible possible, you can pay forward your talents to those in need.

I am truly grateful for each person who has taken the time to read my articles, even if it was for a brief moment. Thank you for your messages and warm gestures. Thank you for following me and each clap for every article. Thank you for being present with me on this journey.

Software Engineer | LinkedIn: simpslandyy | IG: miss.simpsonn. | Twitter: simpslandyy | I wish I had something clever to say, but I don’t.

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