I can't imagine how life changing leaving a 20 year marriage must've been. My 5 year relationship seems like peanuts to that, but I can completely relate.

My ex didn't light the fire in my stomach, but I thought that's how all relationships eventually simmered down to be. By the end of year 4, I had enough, I was tired of compromising, and living contently. I wanted to be genuinely happy from the bottom of my heart.

Luckily for me, he gave me a clear way out. He cheated for 3/5 years. It was easy to walk away. But I can't imagine if I didn't have that out, how hard it would've been to leave. Cause I felt the same as you, I wanted to fight for my relationship. I really believed in forever. But there are some things you can't put into a relationship if it never existed, or if it's completely burnt out.

Thank you for sharing your experience. It's so valuable for young women like myself to hear this perspective. And congratulations on your new relationship. I hope it makes you a lot happier.